How to Fall In Love With Your Body (Without Alienating Others)

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how_to_fall_in_love_with_your_body_without_alienating_others_lottie_lamour

Today on Twitter, I got involved in a heated debate about a picture that a well known beauty brand put up which essentially said that they would pray that my “belly gets flatter” and my “booty gets fatter”.

Right. First of all, this is a COSMETICS BRAND. Stick to showing me make up looks and what eyeliner to use, thanks. Second of all, do not pray for me. I happen to love my round belly. But anyway, why am I telling you this? Because babes, it’s the dawn of the time of the year where fat bodies are used as before photos for weight loss companies. It’s the time for magazines to hone in on celebrity “imperfections” and talk about how to “get a perfect body”. Well NOT THIS YEAR SATAN, NOT THIS YEAR.

Let me give you an alternative. Let me give you empowerment to do something truly radical and eschew all the “thin is in!” mantras they you are about to be subjected to. Here’s a hot take on how to not be a dick:

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If you feel uncomfortable about your body, you have two choices. There is no right answer to this, so read carefully: you can choose to change something about yourself OR you can learn to love who you are. Either of these two options will be the right one depending on what will give you the most happiness.

When I attempted to lose weight many years ago, I was fucking miserable. I scrutinised my figure, I counted calories (and I fucking hate maths) and I constantly stared at pictures of size 10 women and used that to stop me from ordering pizza. I hated myself.

Since finding the body positive community, I’ve never felt so positive about myself. I’ve never been happier about my body. Some of you might find solace in watching weight drop off you AND THATS FINE. Others of you might feel better knowing that your body is beautiful no matter the size and guess what THATS FINE TOO. Choose what is best for your body, mind and soul – whatever that may be. There is no wrong way.

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If you do choose to lose weight, DO NOT PUT DOWN THE BODIES OF THOSE WHO HAVE NOT. Do not use phrases such as “OMG look at how fat I was!!1!” Or “I’m so glad I’m not fat anymore!” Because you weren’t a bad person when you were fat. You were no less of a person than you are now, no less worthy of self love, no less beautiful, smart, funny, caring… Being fat is not a negative.

Of course, this doesn’t mean you can’t celebrate your achievement in completing something you wanted to do. It is easy to celebrate this without putting down the bodies of others. Try using phrases such as: “I love how my body makes me feel” or “I’m proud of what I’ve achieved for my own mental happiness”. You can celebrate your new body without demonising your old one. Neither fat nor thin is positive, what IS positive however, is your new found love for YOURSELF. Any step you take towards loving your own body is great.

Remember kids, ALL BODIES ARE GOOD BODIES. Yes, even those that you might feel are “unhealthy”. Everyone deserves to feel happiness about their figure.

Here’s to a positive 2016. You’re all beautiful!

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Posted by

Plus-size, body positive, feminist, lesbian - ME. Lives in London, has a Nottingham heart.

12 thoughts on “How to Fall In Love With Your Body (Without Alienating Others)

  1. Well done! I’m so glad to hear someone talking about loving your body rather then changing it, truth be told I constantly tell my readers to reasses what they eat and how they stay active but I hope they realise.. as long as they’re healthy they should be happy with what they’ve got.

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  2. What a lovely positive post! I agree that its never fair to put others down based on their size. I was probably guilty of saying things like, ‘I’m so glad I’m not big anymore’ when really I meant ‘I am so glad I am healthier than I was previously’.It’s easy to use’fat’ as a general term for unhealthy but I am still fat and yet I am healthy. I could run circles round many ‘skinny’ people I know. It’s not how you look, It’s how you feel and that’s the main thing.Happy New Year Sweets! x

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