Be an Optimist Prime, not a Negatron – Body Positivity vs Body Snark

Warning – I am a bit of a potty mouth in this post. If bad language offends you, click off this page.

Last night, it appeared that every dickhead was on the internet spreading their negativity and horribleness around the plus-size community. Georgina Horne of Fuller Figure Fuller Bust was subject to a disgusting personal attack on her Facebook page that left her feeling terrible. Girls on the Simply Be page were pulling down the gorgeous Laura of What Laura Loves for wearing a form fitting jumpsuit and daring to share a photo of her wearing it. Not only were the comments vile, but they were also from women who are plus size.

Laura - What Laura Loves
Photo from whatlauralovesuk.com

Now I know I don’t need to get into how ridiculous it is that plus-size women who moan about models not being ‘plus-sized enough’ are dragging down a plus-sized woman who has the confidence and platform to share her outfit. In fact, it’s more of a ‘don’t get me started’ – it’s too warm to get angry today!

Of course the plus size blogger community rallied around and fought back. Simply Be joined in (eventually) and took a stand against it too, removing the majority of the disgusting comments about someone who is from their own community who had the grace and confidence to write about an outfit she loved so other plus size women could see and experience it themselves (God forbid anyone actually do something for someone else…).

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I was so disheartened, upset and quite frankly, angered to my very core. Some of these women were justifying their actions as “just being honest” and saying “don’t worry I’m plus size too” followed by a self-depreciating comment about how fat they are.

If you are plus sized and feeding in to the notion that fat women are unable to wear form fitting clothes, then you’re just as bad as the bloke on the street who calls you fat as you walk past them. In fact, if you are any type of size or shape and you are body snarking any woman of any body type, you need to go and take a long, hard look at yourself.

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As women, we already have so much to contend with without us all fighting against each other. If you put on a piece of clothing and it makes you feel amazing, we should all celebrate that with you. If you feel at your best wearing a baggy top or men’s t-shirts, then you wear the hell out of that shit. If you’re comfortable with wearing a dress with a visible belly outline looking like a badass, then you go momma and look amazing. The minute you put another woman down for wearing something that you wouldn’t personally wear, you become a body snarking dickwad. Who are you to tell a person how she should feel because it doesn’t meet your personal standards of what you think is acceptable?

Here’s what we should do-

  • Let’s stop being dicks to each other – spread positivity not negativity
  • If a woman says she feels great in something, praise her. Even if you personally wouldn’t wear it.
  • If you see negativity around a person’s figure or style, take a stand against it. Don’t just sit and be silent. Change never came from the quiet ones.
  • Wear whatever the fuck feels good on your body, makes you feel like a rockstar and hold your head high.
  • Give. Zero. Shits.

Β Change will only come in society when we all stop being pricks to each other. I wonder what would happen if we took the energy we invest in putting each other down into raising each other up and inspiring women to be confident?

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Posted by

Plus-size, body positive, feminist, lesbian - ME. Lives in London, has a Nottingham heart.

12 thoughts on “Be an Optimist Prime, not a Negatron – Body Positivity vs Body Snark

  1. I don’t understand how people find the energy to hate others. Don’t they have more to do with their life, than try to tear others down? Especially gorgeous confident women!

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  2. I love this:
    “Wear whatever the fuck feels good on your body, makes you feel like a rockstar and hold your head high.
    Give. Zero. Shits.”
    Two years ago I felt so frumpy, unattractive, invisible. Now I know that whenever I want to, I can feel like a rock star and in the words of the late Lynn Dell: “dress for the theatre of my life”

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  3. I’m going to try one of the jumpsuits on and maybe buy one. I think they look nice. As for all the negative comments, I’m astonished! People say they want plus size models then make nasty comments about someone’s body. Shocking. I think Laura looks lovely.

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    1. You should defo try a jumpsuit! It’s a game of trial and error until you find one your comfortable with but my goodness, when you do you’ll feel amazing! I know, isn’t is ridiculous – we need more plus size women with the confidence to post real pictures! Xx

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  4. I’m plus size and I bought my first jump suit today, it’s bright green and I will wear it with pride because it is amazing and will look incredible in it!
    Love this post, do not love that people are still putting women of all shapes and sizes down though.

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    1. I’m so happy to hear this!! Please share photos of this amazing sounding jumpsuit, I’d love to see you in it! We as women have a long way to go until we raise each other above the negativity. Keep fighting the good fight! Xx

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  5. Thanks so much for your support honey. I’ll never begin to understand why people think it is acceptable to try to bring someone down. It says more about them on the inside than it does about me on the outside! xxx

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